Sept 13..
9/13/14…
I M N…
“This is impossible” I muttered as I limped and sought to control my heaving and writhing body.
I paused looking at the Saturday night revellers..
My eyes filled with yearning..
Not for thier lifes but for my life..
How beautifully I would have lived.
Yet, for the billionth time in 13 yrs, I felt the presences on my body.
The muscles unbinding releasing…Contracting loosening.
In a moment I become so tall ppl stare at me …
They smile.
Men and women flirt with me and then I am alone.
How can a man bear such aloneness.
I have spoken to the whole world, provided all the evidence which flowed not og my will.
The creative chi just flows oit of me, like a river of information which links each day, each post.
I am not of this world.
I am not allowed to exist here.
I have never been allowed to exist here..
I have always known this by the efforts even from childhood to hide my true consciousness and adapt.
Yet from me flows ab awareness which will not let me rest.
It keeps my Existence in constant peril.
I am the running man.
Running away and right into a destiny beyond human comprehension.
Yet I am living the creative out pouring of all.thier stories films…
How is this possible I.mutter for the billionth and one time.
I begin walking..
Walking I can’t stop.
I.left Joseph after he came back to the cage after it had closed to give me seven dollars.
Seven dollars…a code.
But still seven dollars.
That made it 8..
I had been through this before through the 13 yrs in New York.
I had been thru all of this before.
Why was I going through this again- writing it, documenting it all on my Face Book page.
I walked.
Why could I not stop walking today.
I had enough money to buy at least something simple.
Why was I walking, I had passed all the tests.
I had been spirited away to my incredulity, saying this was impossible.
I had written to.the world, provided evidence.
Existence had responded..it all checked out perfectly..
Why was I still walking the streets?
Why was my body still being bound.
Why am I still writing from this cafe.
Who has the power to do this to any living being especially one they acknowledge has the memory of Existence Birth..
I walked passed the homeless many of them greet me just as the ones walking with friends to nightclubs and resto smile at me..
I watched myself walking..
I am looking for something I observed…
What my portal.
I knew from experience that it would not come this way.
I had been here before…
I walked calculating how much of the 8 dollars I could spend on food while having enough to come to this cafe.
3 dollars I had to save for coffee leaving me only 5 dollars to eat.
I thought of my being forced to relay every detail of my Existence to strangers on F.B….before the whole world.
I felt the blow to my stomacj but it was less than usual.
I thought of my.mother and the days and yeats which had passed..
25..I had noy stated that I quote the years to myself to give form substance to this experience bc I could not comprehend a force which could impose such a will such a sacrifice on anyone.
But it is real.
I.walked.
I.had experienced human kindness Beauty.. Everyone I had been led to knew of this other realm and reality I luved in. There were ppl who existed not just in movies who would be by my side solving figuring out…with me.
Some Malice had contained me in this play like a video game im which all were spectators to if I would succeed who just watched.
Indifferent.. this was a play designed to crush my spirit.
Challenge the Truth which answered back by refusing to let me forget that this is real.
Affirming this as real and rising in my body and never letting me escape
I was aware of that.
I suddenly found a peach.
It was fresh clean.
Joseph Stern had given me a peach the day I had showered in his home.
Was I walking in his dimension of consciousness..
I walked and found a neatly wrapped up bowl.
Without thinking I picked it up..
Racing forwards.
I did not need the food …
But I saw how I was in a Matrix the way my body moved forcing me forward with intent.
Then I found a bottle of water.
Someone said pizza.
I went and bought pizza two slices..
Infact it was on my route to buy some pizza that I found the Peach then the food then the water…
It was four in the morning..
Now all I need is a book to read on the metro..subway
As I walked to.the Subway there was a Book.
All had materiized by my own thought in what I required to have enough to come to this cafe.
David Philipe Gil had bought me a one weeks metro card.
I paused in the street wanting to weep in frustration.
It is real.
I have been through this before when I was unaware of why I was walking the streets and what was happening to.my life..
When I was figuring it out.
How I developed my codes and ability to read harmony from seeming chaos.
I was not humilated but it felt humilating after all I had done all I had contributed.
It was Evil.
As Evil as the darkness I had fought.
Something which could put any being through this.
I had fought it and solved its codes but it was never satisfied.
Now the only thing left was mosquitoes..would I be allowed to eat in peace
I.went back to Pelham Bay Park..
I bought a cheap beer and some candy.
The same ritual I observe when I am chez moi.
I eat dinner with wine have dessert.
I.had conditioned myself to do the same but with the least budget during all my training.
The food I ate was African.
It was as the soups I had eaten in Nigeria filled with vegeatables meat beans.
It was good.
But I was not hungry I forced myself to Eat.
There were no mosquitoes.
And then I woke up and then fell into a state.
I was in a Beautiful.Garden.
With someone a prince or a King.
We watched the arrival of the arrival of the Arch of the Covenant.
But it was differeny from that of the Jewish lore.
It was a literal magnificent Arch Space ship of stunning Beauty with sculptures in the background and people reclining on its platform.
It was so sumptiously beautiful luxurious and decadent but of a purity.
It floated on the water.
The King Or prince greeted a woman of African ancestry she had one eye like the Moon instead of a real eye.
She wore a robe and looked more like a Pirate Queen.
As they finished speaking
I went down the steps to speak to her asking how she had managed to naviagate this Arch Space ship througj the worlds..
She said something about floating it…
Then from my the words tore from my heart.
“They refused to acknowledge me!..”
There was incredible sadness and disbelief in my voice.
She replied
“Me too..only three acknowledge me…only three..
I looked onto her face…grief.
And I placed my hand on her head and let it trail down the front of her dress intil I was bowed down on the ground beneath her feet..my body lying in a repose of a calm bt impossible grief and sadness.
E.K.
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