5:54 P.M.
2-4-8.
4-2-8…
5:55 pm.
E:EE.
The Truth is not a bitter Truth to swallow.
I stood outside of 268, having struggled with this concept of having to swallow the most bitter pill in Existence.
The Truth of the power of a lie…
Or the journey of 26 years, where I wrote the first entry in my journals as a 22 yr old stating that I would show that there is order, Logos in the universe.
It was not an arrogant or concieted claim.
But an awareness, a memory that I always retained.
And of course, the Consciousness of the clear headed child within which can see, read and link the cause and effect.
26 years later, I stand outside a place where I knew was the last portal of a host of people who had a love or recognition of what I represented had open up thier doors, homes lifes.. And hearts to me.
But I had done the unforgivable to each and everyone of them.
I had told them the Truth, they truth they had all once believed to be true but the reality of Life’s experiences, and thier efforts to live that truth had been met with hurts so deep it had created a rage of a wound which they had somehow let me access that place.
And when that truth had not manifested, I had unwittingly hurt them and reminded them of the own hurt and immeasurable dissatisfaction and dissapointment they had felt.
It did not matter, that I could point out where their focus had been alittle askew.
No blame, just someone pointing out perhaps if you changed the focus here a bit…
You might see clearly through the rage of your hurts where you might have erred…
Unintentionally…
But who was I?
I had nothing, they were housing me, some of them feeding me.
How could I speak, what right did I have to speak if my Existence seemed or was a Nightmare..
But I felt that I could speak because, I could read and that every step of my trek had been affirmed.
But not even I could swallow where I had to go, what I had to endure.
The suffering I had to surmount.
I recall knowing with surety in 2OO5, that this was not it.
No matter how much the paths I was forging, the way was so hideously cruel.
That I knew I had to leave the play.
Leave the country.
Whatever this was, this was not the way
I ran to the British Embassy but to my amazement (and to many witnesses) I was rebuked by a woman who just lost it..
Saying I had to stay in New York and finish what I started.
People were staring at her, because what she was saying made no sense..
But it did to me
That was the nearest perhaps I came to going off the edge.
The same day, I met Johnny Original and was led to the Green House in Soho, were I met Jerry and Sue..
And then a host of “Supernatural” or people of evolved Consciousness.
It was Sue who told me that I had to go to a certain place where before the Man walked the Earth
I protested.
But I remember…
But a situation manifested where I left.
I found myself living in an alley for 61 days…
And yet I knew what was going on where I was being led.
To Death…
To Nnamdi…
But this was not the way
Yet 61 days later I found Generation X gardens.
I knew where I was and knew I had found the last portal.
But I instead found myself in what I knew was the realm of Spirits or Mind.
My current host hearing my story and predicament invited me to stay and gave me food and Shelter.
That was 8 years and almost 8 months ago.
(88..28..16..7.64..1O..17-..8…no 78…just 8…
everything in Harmony before E rose as 11:28 )
I have been hosted by him in total for 5 years abd 7 years
Living in the realm where everything I read stated that I was in the right place.
My host and I had conversations which I knew the whole world should have witnessed.
But an unseen world was..this I knew
But I was in New York, the lower east side.
People had to live, eat, do the things people do in this realm to Exist.
And here I was living seeing knowing that I was living percieving reading that I was in another space and place at the same time.
In those 8.8 yrs I fought so hard to escape, to prove the Beautiful Truth.
I could not go through this again, or put yet another person through the Truth- pointing out the Beautiful Truth…
Yet another Truth, the Ugliest Truth always rearing its head and mocking the Beautiful Truth.
No one can truly judge a person unless you walk in thier shoes.
I am a beautifully proud man.
And I fought for the beautiful truth..
But the overwhelming ugly truth…
was that no matter what I did, I waa locked in the ugliest truth so inconceivable to the mind of the Westeren man and yet so easily to accept by the Older cultures of superstitions…
Which one denying and the other fatally accepting that Masters or Victims of a Supernatural Play.
I could accept neither.
There was a bridge which linked them both to common sense
Yet, there was the Supernatural at play as well as the Material nature at play with a power so extraordinary that I could not accept it and finally stopped seeking to escape and instead explain the truth I remembered and could read.
Which would affirm.
But I was up against a rage so vast…
I just could not accept its truth…
So I fought and endured alone
I swallowed peoples treatment of me..
For if they could not walk in my shoes.
Or if my Explanation of what I was experiencing was so incredible .
Would it not make sense for people to enquired what was wrong with a person to hold on to a beautiful Truth which only gave him an Existence …so terrible, so cruel
“I am the Lord thy God, I am a jealous God. Thou shall have no other God but me”
I shudder at that old testament concept of God.
Which in the Bible story Jesus came to evolve to a God of Light and Love.
And here I was proving God a Consciousness of Truth.
A Creator whose Truth is reflected and literal in every one
Common sense in this reality dictates that I am a grown man who has no place to live.
An intelligent man, who has lived 14 years in the toughest city or ” Money Capital of the World and endured all humans worst nightmares…
Has proven before an entire world what I set out as a 22-23 year old to demonstrate that there is Logos Order, Harmony in the universe.
That the prophet Muhammad and Allah really was about identifying how to read …
Read one stream of Consciousness and link it to world around you until it is anchored in Fact
Brooks Lucas…
The post I shared of Stay Ready…
Alerted by the Espirit of Ceta Lee PeterWow…
Means “Stream of Luminousity”
Common sense dictates that the Ugly Truth is the bitter Truth of this was not about my truth beautiful being wrong..
But about something wishing me and beings such as I to suffer so unimaginably for staying true to the Beautiful Truth.
6:57 pm.
I saw a guy walk past.
He was wearing a shirt with skull and bones with the number 78 blazoned on it in large numbers with the word DEATH on it.
I am now at 78 Spring Street.
Common sense would dictate that I would be looking for a place to store my things.
And where to sleep.
I have instead 3 USD in my pocket…
I am here because I have tried everything else.
7:O1 p.m.
You have to walk in my shoes before you can judge and condemn me.
Cont’d
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